OT Poll: I'm Running for President

BrassBlower · Post by **BrassBlower** » Sun Mar 21, 2004 9:38 pm

As some of you may know, I'm running for President of the Republic of Antarctica. Of course, I would appreciate your support, but I need help choosing a running mate. That is why I created this poll.

I am campaigning on the issues of two free veterinarian visits a year for all penguins, a moratorium on the construction of Wal-Mart Supercenters on the Antarctic continent, and a strong military for defense against ice borers and the occasional renegade penguin.

Elections are to be held Thursday, April 1. I would appreciate your vote.

Redwolf · Post by **Redwolf** » Sun Mar 21, 2004 9:44 pm

Well, it was a tough call, but I voted for Walden because then you'd have your very own built-in political cartoonist!

Hmmm...I wonder what kind of whistles you'd need to play in Antartica?

Redwolf

The Weekenders · Post by **The Weekenders** » Sun Mar 21, 2004 10:20 pm

(practicing my stemwinder speech). I .... NEEED..... TO.....TALK....REAL....SLOW....

Are you colder than you were four years ago???

Monster · Post by **Monster** » Sun Mar 21, 2004 10:26 pm

Looks like a three way race at the moment. Walden, Weekenders, Zoob. I voted for weekenders, as every candidate needs a contra-Berkely running mate.

Rando7 · Post by **Rando7** » Sun Mar 21, 2004 10:28 pm

Would your running mate be moving to Antactica if you win?

Zubivka · Post by **Zubivka** » Mon Mar 22, 2004 4:52 am

<----- just slicked up my image as a responsible, compassionate, best possible candidate for Vice. The Party is now called *New* Vice.

Rando7 wrote:Would your running mate be moving to Antactica if you win?

With our long dedication to the cause of, err.. Antarnica, can you doubt it?
1) If your running mate wasn't moving, he'd freeze, dude!
2) Keeping a public office in Breizh makes it difficult, yet ah vouch to commute to Anthraxica once every day as soon as the the sun goes up!

My program for Antipodia--for I have a program, while the others, eh? :roll:

1—Moderation
a) More moderation
b) Ever more moderation!
c) Let the heavy swordfish of Justice slap the immoderates. :adminno:

2—Justice
Tweak the constitution for:
a)... and Free Guinness for all
b)... and the right to take whistles.

3—Social issues
No child should be left wihout a free whistle.

4—Economy and stock exchange
Don't tell us we'll dig a deficit this way. We'll finance the above by putting a 0.05% sales tax on every high-end whistle transaction on this board. At the rythm they shuffle, we'll also easily finance quite soon a low whistle grant for every student.

5—Environment
Immediate world ban on narwhal tusk use for low whistles, walrus tusk use for high whistles and same species penis bone for garklein recorders.
To make sure, generally ban sopranino recorders.
This will teach them in Arctica to do whatever they fancy downstairs under our feet, undermining the planet's balance. They really fell on their heads.

6—Diplomacy
Lobby with all Southern Hemisphere for a change of the Nordocentric view of the world. Change the United Nations flag to show the planet with us up, and the Southern Cross on top to complete our New Orb.

7—Public Morality
Requalify the term of Vice President, really. I suggest Bias President. It conveys way better he's the number two (as in "Bi") and replaces "Vice" with a more acceptable form of fun (as in... oh, nevermind).

Ranttactica for ever!

BrassBlower · Post by **BrassBlower** » Mon Mar 22, 2004 8:32 am

I am prepared for the move if I am elected. Note my new avatar and location.

TomB · Post by **TomB** » Mon Mar 22, 2004 10:00 am

My vote is for Bloomie, because besides being your running mate, he can also function as your Press Secretary and Spin Doctor, at a minimum.

All the Best, Tom

BrassBlower · Post by **BrassBlower** » Mon Mar 22, 2004 10:01 am

Keep in mind, I also plan to appoint Joanie Madden as Secretary of Music!

GaryKelly · Post by **GaryKelly** » Mon Mar 22, 2004 10:09 am

I voted for Bloomie too, whether he likes it or not.

I would've voted for Zoob, since I particularly enjoyed his manifesto. However, I remain concerned; We ancient Brits have long known of the Gallic tendency to eat anything that moves (and many things that don't move)...

Seeing words such as: 'swordfish', 'guinness', 'narwhale', 'walrus', 'tusk' and 'antipodia' in Zoobie's manifesto sent a shiver a length of me. I have some very good friends who are penguins, and don't like to think of them in terms of haute cuisine.

Zubivka · Post by **Zubivka** » Mon Mar 22, 2004 10:31 am

No compromise a good Vise Prez couldn't squeeze.

I just elected residency in Kerguelen Islands*, so as to be both closer to office in Fantastica and to home, Brittany.

And ready to work night and day--all I need is a 4 m.† sleep per night, maybe steeling half a m. in the afternoon to release the pressure.

PS: BrassBlower, such a small world! I see we're neighbours: Le Mont Ross is in Les Kerguelens.

* "Kerguelen Islands" http://www.eos.ubc.ca/personal/weis/res ... gArch.html

† from Aug. o'clock PM to Nov. o'clock AM

GaryKelly wrote:I have some very good friends who are penguins, and don't like to think of them in terms of haute cuisine.

I pray you reconsider, for:
1) There's no worse abuse to the creatures of God than the British habit of boiling them 'til deflavourized then serve them with mint sauce. Our sauces, as a contrary, are a prayer to the spirit of the creature, may it rest in *burp* peace.
2) Brits again are the one known to slay Emperors (penguins, or corsican dwarf emperors) in remote southern islands. They torture them to death with mint sauce.
3) Kerguelen Islanders feed solely on the silly rabbits they introduced on the islands.

Montana · Post by **Montana** » Mon Mar 22, 2004 10:41 am

Time is short; the territory these guys would be ruling is shrinking so the time to act is now!
Zoob has a plan of action; this is the kind of man who can take on all those would-be emperor (penguins) down there. The administration also might want to develop a sort of Star-Wars project using a bunch of fans or something to blow the ozone hole over the Sahara - it's a desert anyway. Just remember: the slippery slopes are more slippery down there...

BrassBlower · Post by **BrassBlower** » Mon Mar 22, 2004 10:42 am

Zoob, so far it looks like you're edging out Walden and Bloomie, but it's still very early. It will be interesting to see the final results on March 31.

ChrisLaughlin · Post by **ChrisLaughlin** » Mon Mar 22, 2004 12:06 pm

Hmmm... not doing so well here.
I do feel inclined to point out, however, that Antarctica is, subject to the 1959 Antarctic Treaty, the collective property of the world community. Numerous countries have submitted claims of ownership, but none of the them have been recognized.
That said, I am confident that with a Vice President such as myself, well trained in international law, we may increase our chances of consolidating control of the Antarctic region.... then we can melt the ice-caps with a thermonuclear device and commence to mine the rich mineral deposits below the surface, making us, YOU AND I, into the RICHEST PEOPLE IN THE WORLD!!!!! Mu-ha-ha-ha-ha!!!!
Don't worry about the penguins... they can fly away somewhere to safety.

Remember, a vote for Chris is a vote for the terrorists.

Chris

fancypiper · Post by **fancypiper** » Mon Mar 22, 2004 12:15 pm

I'll cast my vote for the penguin and pennywhistle ticket. How could anyone not????

Linux + whistles = contentment + peace of mind

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